I’ll Be Home for Christmas
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IMDB rating: 4.20 Plot: A college student experiences difficulty in getting home for Christmas after being hazed by his friends. While struggling to get home in time for Christmas, he learns quite a bit about himself and the true meaning of the holiday. |
Actors: Thomas Jonathan Taylor,LaVorgna Adam,Cole Gary,Lauer Andrew,O’Bryan Sean,de la Cruz Mark,Kenny Jack,Comedy,Family,
Repeat of a question requesting family advice MY PARENTS vs MY WIFE?
I need help sorting out my parents relationship with me and my wife.?
My mother fell out with my wifes parents a long time ago over a situation where she was well out of order. but she expected me to chose between her or my wife. I stood by my wife and so she never came to our wedding and very rarely contacts us or aknowledges our baby at any time other than Christmas.
My father and step mum have also fallen out with us over a whole load of petty things that they have been stewing over for ages. We forgot a birthday, had to ask them to look after our dog at very short notice when my wifes nan fell ill. (we were staying in a hotel and asked if they would mind looking after our dog an extra day so we could stay an extra day at the hotel but they said no) we bought some stuff off them and then my wife found out that they had made a small profit on it, they only live 5 miles away from us but rarely pop over to see us or our new baby which we could have done with after my wife gave birth as she had a very hard labour, they felt that her parents were there too much and they dont like them. All petty stuff really. Anyway, my dad would visit on the odd occasion and just go on about how my mum left him 5 years ago for another man and that my brother hates me for what happened to my mother.
My wife basicly had had enough of the grief we were getting and had been getting eversince we got engaged…my dad thought we got engaged when we did because he was away and it meant my mum could come and celebrate with us (she basicly invited herself), I got an award at work where my parents could come to the ceremony, my dad wouldnt come if my mum was coming, my dad and step mum felt we got married too early and had a baby too early, my mum refused to come to our wedding after the argument with my wifes parents and I’d stood by my wife, my brother and I own a house together and he kept taking the house account overdrawn and I had to keep bailing him out and he hasnt ever aknowledged our baby or seen him because of the situation with my mother. My dad wont go and see my brother because he wants to be invited and wont just turn up. My brothers been driven to a breakdown because of the stress with our family and he’s given up his job.
My wife hates my family because of all this **** and so one evening when my dad and step mum came over, there was an awkward atmosphere and the next day I got a phone call at work from my step mum wanting to know what was up. I just played it down at first but then she emailed my wife and bollocked her so my wife replied then she got another email and now my wife wont entertain visiting my dad and step mum or letting our little boy anywhere near my step mum. She gets so upset if I say I’m going to as when ever I do i have to just sit there and listen to how bad we’ve been, how it’s all our fault, that my wife is behaving like my mother, that we’ve caused so much upset and when I get home I just feel like I want to run away from everyone and never come back and I’m bloody 32 years old! We havent seen my dad since November and while I really want to see him because he is my dad, because of how upset my wife gets and the fact that I dont want to sit there and listen to them slagging me and my wife off, I havent. Therefore I keep getting emails about how I need to get my priorities sorted and stand up to my wife and go round and see them. An email which my wife read before I knew about it as she was checking my emails for me while i was away. Now she feels even stronger hate towards my step mum for sending it. This is so complicated and long!!! I know it’s my responsibility to stand by my wife and I have and will but God it’s being made so hard.
Additional Details
I feel guilty about not seeing them and get emails from them saying how much I’ve hurt them and that they wont contact us again. I want to see them but I know that when I go over, I will just get loads of crap and be left feeling that I dont want to go over again. I’m not sure what to say to them to try to sort this out while not upsetting my wife.
Best Answer so far –
Funny how you keep saying that you should stand by your wife, but has it occurred to you that your wife should stand by you as well?
From the looks of it, many small petty things have got in the way of a possibly amiable relationship. Now the big step is for you, the bridge, to do some linking. Have a chat with your wife and let her know how you value your father and wish you spend time with him. Assure her that you’ll have a talk to your father and step-mother as well, so that she won’t feel it’s just one-sided.
Of course, the next step is to talk to your father and step-mother. Let them know how trapped in the middle you are and you’re seeking their bigheartedness to let go of past misunderstandings and grudges and start anew with your wife. Your step-mother should stop emailing to your wife. Let YOU be the liaison until she can allow herself to communicate
you couldnt make this any shorter…??
lovely girl | Feb 03, 2010
I tell you what If I had this kind of daily bulllshit drama no way in helll would I live near by. We would move a state away. And we would keep our calls and emails to a bear minimum. Keeping the drama down to zero.
Soo much of this is sooo petty. I’ts just incomprehensible to me.
All I can say is you and her move away. Lord.
no1advice | Feb 03, 2010
You’re right~ PETTY. My mom’s a whack job, yet, I have decided to get along with her. I highly recommend it.
ouragon | Feb 03, 2010
Tags: 1998, Cole Gary, Comedy, de la Cruz Mark, Family, Kenny Jack, Lauer Andrew, LaVorgna Adam, O'Bryan Sean, Thomas Jonathan Taylor